Two things I’ve always known: I’ve always wanted to be an artist and I’ve always felt called to be a mom. I’m very blessed that I have been able to be both as my vocation. To date, this is the largest watercolor painting I’ve ever worked on. It’s a slightly larger than life-size portrait of my daughter, Holly, just shy of her 4th birthday. The final painting measures 24×36″.

I started off by sketching Holly on a separate piece of paper before transferring the final drawing to a hand stretched watercolor canvas I made. Because I’m on-duty mom during the day, I could only work on the painting after the girls went to bed (and after getting some “veg out” Netflix time with the husband). Most nights felt like chipping away at an iceberg, but I actually finished what I set out to accomplish.

There were lots of late nights after the girls went to bed, lots of tears throughout the painting process, lots of prayers, and a whole lot of love for my sweet daughter…

Two days before finishing this painting, I was in tears because I was struggling with part of the painting. I started to tell myself the lie that I’m not “good enough.” I struggle with anxiety and depression, and since things had been a little hectic over the last few months, I felt a little more on edge. My kind husband suggested that I take a “night off” from the painting and return to it with fresh eyes. When I picked up the brushes again, I painted feverishly while the baby napped. It was like my hand couldn’t stop moving. I told Holly she could watch all the TV she wanted while I worked and then I was done within the hour!

Lots of people ask what Holly thinks of her portrait. In the early stages when I would show it to her, she was always excited that I was painting her, but she would point out things like, “Mom, you still need to paint my eyes” or “I need hair.” Four year olds… ha ha. The day I finished, she told me, “That looks great, Mom” and wanted to take a picture with the painting.

I finished the painting a couple days before a call for entries for a regional art show at the Lincoln Gallery in Loveland that I had been eyeing. The painting was accepted into the 2018 Regional Fine Art Show. Though the opening reception was a little bit rocky, it was a very positive experience. I was honored to be featured with all of the other INCREDIBLE artists. All of the pieces in the show were truly top notch. I felt really honored to be featured among such great talent.

We took Holly and Mayumi to the gallery to see the painting on display. Holly was acting really bashful, but enjoyed seeing the art and perked up a little bit when our family was offered candy by the gallery attendant.

The experience has been a really emotional one for me. This is the first year that I ever dared to submit artwork to call for entries. There was a part of me that feared rejection and another part of me that would try to tell me, “You’re not good enough. Why even bother?” My inner voice isn’t always very kind, but I’ve learned a lot over this past year on how to quiet that voice and listen to God’s encouraging voice. I felt called to paint Holly in this simple moment in time, I felt called to enter this particular call for entries, and I was accepted. It was a big accomplishment for many reasons.

The closing reception was a few days ago, and when I went to pick up my painting, I received nothing but encouragement. The two staff members helping artists sign-out their paintings were very kind. When I entered the gallery, they said, “We were just talking about you! We loved having your painting. Everyone who stopped by loved looking at it and talked about how sweet the little girl and her pose was.” They proceeded to tell me that they would love to have my work in their gallery again and encouraged me to apply for the National Fine Art Show next spring. I can’t wait to make some new artwork, so I can hopefully experience this gallery adventure again.

Here’s some more details of the painting: